I really don't know what to say or where to start.
On my Facebook I have been posting news articles about what is going on with adoptions in the Congo right now. Maybe you read one of the articles but did not know what it means by "exit letter," so I will cover all that in this update.
First, a quick review:
We received our referral of C, a beautiful little girl that turns 3 next month, in August.
In September we received a referral for E, another beautiful little girl that is 2 but her birthday was not (and still is not) known, so she could be 3 already or have a birthday soon approaching.
Here are the basics of what happens next:
1) Our Congolese lawyers obtain a court date in the Congolese court for our adoption hearing. Our lawyers represent us at this court date, and we legally become C and E's parents if/when the Congolese judge rules in our favor to adopt C and E.
2) With the help of our lawyers and agency, we submit visa applications to the U.S. Embassy in Kinshasa (the capital of DRC, and C and E's current location). The Embassy then does a thorough investigation that averages 4-6 months to complete before they issue C and E's visas. These visas are needed to bring them to the U.S.
3) After the visas are issued, we book our plane tickets and travel to the DRC. We will be united with them pretty shortly after arriving. Then, we turn in the paperwork to get the girls' exit letters from the DGM. This is basically the Congolese immigration department, and even though the girls will be legally ours, we must receive signed exit letters from the DGM for each of the girls in order to be able to board the plane and leave the country with them. The average time to apply for and receive an exit letter was 7-10 days. (Note I say "was," and keep reading.)
Of course, there's a little more that goes into the process within and between these three steps, but that is a general overview.
On paper, this is the process that stands between us and our girls. In reality, there are other things going on that are preventing these things from happening as smoothly as any adoptive parent would desire.
The DRC is the #1 poorest country in the world. I have a high amount of love and respect for the Congolese people. They have seen their beautiful country torn apart with war, unrest, and poverty. After having to fight against a large rebel group not even one year ago, just last week another group attacked Kinshasa. Over half of the country's 66 million people fall well below the poverty line. Oppression, corruption, and abuse run rampant. Disease, malnutrition, and lack of affordable quality health care make an already hard life even harder. It is estimated there are 5 million orphans, and I don't know if this number includes the children living on the streets because they have been accused of witchcraft or there is no room in the orphanages. My heart is broken for the forgotten, rejected, and abused people in this country that is so poor economically yet so wealthy in natural resources. Brett and I have dreams of moving there one day, but I will save the details for sometime down the road.
So we got our referrals in August and September. In late September, we receive notification that exit letters are suspended for up to 12 months. I was in shock. I couldn't believe it; I didn't want to believe it. We felt the suspension would be lifted by the time we personally get to that final step, as we still have roughly 3ish months to pass court and then another 4-6ish months to pass the U.S. Embassy investigation before their visas are issued and we can travel. But I have friends that I've made through Congo adoption FB groups that this impacts... friends that were so close to traveling over to bring their kids home, friends that have been through court and legally have children an ocean apart from them now. We all have followed the rules and we all want to bring these children into our lives to be part of our families forever. But, alas, evil exists in this world. And someone has adopted from the Congo using false documents, and someone has adopted and then sold that child to unfit parents upon arriving back into the U.S. So the few that have broken the rules, the few that have adopted with evil intent, have messed it up for the many that genuinely want to make a beloved son or daughter out of an orphan... for Christ followers that want to live out James 1:27.
There are actually five families that traveled around the time that the suspension took place that are literally stuck in the DRC right now. You can read an article about them from the New York Daily News by clicking this link. Three of them have recently written blogs about what has happened as they have spent several weeks and months waiting for this one signed piece of paper so they can come home. Click on their last names to read their blog posts about being stuck, and ways you can help: The Carrolls, the Harshmans, and the Wallaces. Please help, and please pray.
Many more than that rightly traveled to bring home their children because they had met the cutoff date, but due to finances, job or family needs at home, and the uncertainty of how long this is going to take they had to make the excruciating decision to leave THEIR child until the suspension is lifted. This includes one family that is with the same agency as us.
We have yet to find out how this is going to impact us, C, and E. We have been waiting to hear about a court date for almost 2 months, so I am afraid the exit letter suspension may be affecting the adoption hearings even though they are two totally different divisions of the Congolese government and process. The December 30th outbreak of violence certainly hasn't helped either.
By the way, we just passed our 2 year anniversary. It was late December of 2011 when we submitted our application to be accepted into our agency's new Congo program. At the time, Congo adoptions were taking only about a year or less due to the orphan crisis. I never in my wildest dreams imagined we would be 2 years into this and still be a year or more away from meeting our new children.
The picture we have of C is now one year old. When we got her referral in August, the picture was already outdated by 8 months. One of the lawyers has visited C and E's orphanage and taken updated pictures of them, but every time they try to scan and send them an error occurs. Please don't take for granted your ability to snap, upload, and share a picture in an instant. In a world of instant access to everything here in America, it is hard to remember it wasn't always this easy.
I really don't know how to end this, except to say that I am incredibly disheartened by all of this. If I didn't have Jesus to cling to, to turn to and trust, I don't know what I would do. I guess I'd probably never get out of bed or eat my weight in white chocolate truffles or throw my hands in the air and give up on this adoption. I'm finding myself praying the same prayers over C and E that I pray over Brielle: "Thank You for the privilege of being her Mom. I trust You with her life. Not my will Lord, but Yours be done." This is a prayer I had to pray a lot when I was battling an irrational fear of losing Brielle to tragedy. I still do pray it, but no longer am I afraid to utter those words. I've relinquished the need to try to control her future, to make sure it is safe and comfortable. I rest in knowing that she is a gift, but before she was mine she was His. She still is His, and she always will be. I must start praying this about C and E. I cry even now as I imagine this process never ending. I don't want to lose them, Lord. But they are not yet mine. And before I even knew their names or saw their faces, they were already His. They are His now, and they always will be... whether or not I am given the privilege of being their Mom.
Thank You for the privilege of knowing C and E... for hearing their heartbreaking stories and gazing upon their faces and praying protection, provision, love, joy, and peace for them while I do all in my power to bring them home. I trust You with their lives. Not my will Lord, but Yours be done.
