Trusting, Running, Selling

Ok, I'm just going to be real here as I talk about things involving trusting, running, and selling. I can't pretend like I have my act together on these three important things when I really don't. So please don't judge! Pray, show me some love by looking at these things with an open and caring heart, but don't sit there and think, "That girl's got issues." (Well, I guess you can think that if you want, since I am  already admitting that I do...) Deep breath, and here I go.

Trusting...

To those that visit our site pretty regularly looking for an update... I am so sorry! We have not had anything to report, but we are hoping for some good news soon. We did have an online meeting (webinar) with our adoption agency, and it was cool to get to see the faces of some of the others that are taking this same journey to adopt from DRC on this pilot program. I do have a few things I want to say regarding things we have learned about our adoptive child(ren) through meeting with our case worker and through the webinar, but I will save that stuff until I can find the time to write about it well. I just want to keep the focus of this post on what's going on with fundraising right now, and some of my thoughts about each of the fundraisers. Because here we are, nine months on our journey since we first applied to adopt. Almost all we had saved has been paid out (we have a little left of what we had saved prior to starting, in addition to all that has been donated/fundraised so far), and we are starting to feel the financial burden of this process trying to intimidate us. I call it a "burden" with hesitancy because this is a burden we are happy to carry. It is necessary (although we wish so much it wasn't, since many - including ourselves - hesitate to adopt due to the cost), and it is worth every penny. 

Ok, and here begins my "issues": I can't help but feel like a few people out there think it is wrong of us to be so open about our financial need, like we should've had ALL of it saved before we started and it's not their problem that we don't. I feel like maybe that thought, or something similar, is what keeps some from choosing to help. Unless you do feel that way, please don't take that personally. No specific person comes to mind. Maybe I think some people feel that way because it is ME feeling that way in those moments where I stress about the sum of money we are needing. But then I let God deal with my stress, and He reminds me that He called us on this journey and He won't abandon us no matter what the struggle is we face. It shows in me a lack of trust in God to provide, and I never want to be found not trusting Him. HE IS MY LIFE! So when I step back I realize that this isn't about me and my fears. This is about God, about doing what He has etched so deeply onto our hearts and sent us to do with the command to not worry about how or when He will provide. He's not bound to time, so He doesn't feel the pressure of time frames like I do. I need to keep reminding myself that. 

The second ugly thing in my thoughts/feelings sometimes is I feel like people get annoyed when I am constantly talking about something related to fundraising on Facebook... about yard sales or Scentsy products or t-shirts, or, more recently, a 5K. It seems these things don't get quite the response as other things I post on Facebook because they involve an investment into our adoption beyond hitting the like button. And, let me reiterate, nobody in specific comes to mind as I write this. Nobody has directly said anything to me to make me feel this way... it's just a feeling I get, even if it's a wrong one. Because my intentions are not to annoy people or tempt them to hide me from their Newsfeed. All I want is to provide everyone an opportunity to partner with us in forever changing the life/lives of an orphan/s, and I can't do that well without using social media. To those that have taken me up on such opportunities: You have made my heart glad and I delight in seeing your generosity, love, and desire to help. On the flip side, if you are feeling offended because you haven't done anything to help... please don't be. It is not my desire to make anyone feel like they are supposed to want to be involved in any of our fundraisers, yet I know with writing it is hard for you to see my heart. I am merely sharing what it feels like when something that means the world to you gets treated as if it's just another cookie dough fundraiser for a school. It hurts a little. But that hurt gets swallowed up whole whenever even just one or two people respond with a willing heart. All you willing hearts, you have no idea what it has meant to us. You definitely keep discouragement and frustration from overtaking us. May we be a blessing to you as you have been a blessing to us.

Running...

I have never been one that enjoys it. I started running (yeah... with large intervals of walking and jogging mixed in) as part of my gym routine in January and still don't enjoy it. But when a precious friend/runner asked if we had considered a 5K as a means to raise money, I decided that I would learn to like running. I will learn to like just about anything if it is going to help us bring our kid(s) home. We decided in the early summer that we wanted to try to coordinate a 5K Race/ Fun Run to benefit our adoption. Little did we know exactly how much work and money that entails. When we found out that it really wasn't going to be doable this year, that precious friend/runner at church suggested that we run in a race that has already been planned, try to recruit some others to join us as a team, and seek out sponsors to donate to our cause. I was a little nervous because, as is obvious above, I am struggling with some feelings of rejection at times. What if nobody joins us? What if nobody donates? But again I knew that God was telling me to let go of the "what ifs" and seek Him. 

So we decided to go for it. As we prayed for direction as to what 5K to run, God literally mailed it to us. It was totally surreal.

Let me back up for a minute. There are not a whole lot of 5Ks to choose from in our big ole city. After speaking with that running friend of ours, we had decided a couple months ago we were going to choose a local school's 5K fundraiser. Brielle goes to preschool there, so we figured it would be a good place for our registration fee to go to since we do have to pay that to run. But after checking the date of it a few weeks ago, we found out it is the exact same morning that we had already bought tickets to Disney on Ice as celebration of Brielle's 5th birthday. Brielle chose those tickets over having a party, so we couldn't cancel on her. So this 5K plan fell through the day after I posted on Facebook that we were trying to organize a team. I was afraid that we would not find another run that would be suited for us. Then, my worry disappeared as God reassured me that He has a plan. 

A few days pass. Brett brings the mail in after work and sits at the kitchen table, going through it. I join him, and my heart was just totally overjoyed when in my hand I held a postcard from our adoption agency, Lifeline. The front reads: "R(un) for One: Hope for the (un)adopted. Saturday September 29, 2012". On the back is all of the details. That date is the weekend after Brielle's birthday. When I saw this, I was just like... Wow! No way, God! This is perfect and AWESOME! Perfect date, not a big registration fee, and perfect cause that our registration goes to!! It was just incredible. Lifeline is a non-profit Christian agency that works in our country as well as many across the world. But they don't just work to place orphans into forever families, although that in itself would still be an amazing thing. They don't stop there. They also work to bring care to the orphans that are not being adopted. There are between 147-163 MILLION orphans in the world. How many get adopted per year? Roughly 250,000. But as those are being adopted, millions more are still being orphaned. This is an epidemic that most of the world ignores, whether on purpose or out of lack of awareness. Ok sorry for the soapbox moment. Let me get to my point: The registration fee is going to now be used to help orphans, while the donations we raise are going to be used to help bring our orphan(s) home. We know two things: They are there, living in horrifying conditions, alone, with saddening statistics stacked against the hope of being embraced into a loving family in this lifetime. And we also know that more than anything our hearts long for them to be home NOW... So we can show them how much we value, cherish, and adore them and tell them how much they are loved. So we can kiss them goodnight and tell them everything is ok when they awaken from a nightmare. So we can teach them about the amazing, unfailing love of Jesus Christ and raise them to trust in Him as their Savior, Redeemer, and King. So we can provide their basic needs, which are currently going unmet or poorly met. So we can show them the love that Jesus has shown us by adopting us into His family. 

And we don't have pictures or know their names or their sex or their age, but we know that they are there right now because God has set in us an insatiable love and desire for them to be here in our arms as our son(s)/daughter(s). That is only one or two less orphans out of 147-163 million. Nevertheless... it is still one or two less. So we pray that the desire God rooted in us to pursue adoption take root in the hearts of believers, and we pray for the orphans without families pursuing them, and we donate and we speak out for them. And now, we get to run for them. My heart is broken yet overjoyed all at once. Because God is faithful, and beautiful, and the giver of everything good. Love for orphans, though sometimes excruciatingly painful, is good. Adoption is good. Those precious children, made in His image, are good. Through loving and serving and accepting them, we love and serve and accept Jesus Christ Himself. Another unintended soapbox moment. I will step down now and give you the details, lest you be interested in joining our team:

When: Saturday September 29, 2012, 8:00 am
Where: Birmingham, AL. 4800 Valleydale Road
Cost: $30 if registered by September 26; $35 on race day


As far as trying to raise money, all I know to do is just ask. "Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." (2 Corin 9:7) In other words, if you don't have much to give but it has been decided in your heart, $5 is a beautiful gift. It is a matter of what is laid on hearts, not the actual number. There is no amount too great or small, and we have seen exactly how a bunch of small amounts come together to make a big amount (ie: our yard sale). We are just going to trust God and obey His lead, and whether or not this fundraiser ends up raising the amount we need now is not going to concern us or rob us of any of the joy we get to experience along this 5K journey! And after a crazy 1st month of internship derailed my workout/running schedule, it felt good to get back on the treadmill today. I only have 13 days to prepare and to try to raise some money, but I am determined to not worry. Even if we raise nothing, it will still be an incredible cause that our registration fees go to. And, it will be my our first time to complete a 5K race. Hopefully I can learn to love running between now and then. Didn't love it today... but I did like it, just a little.

To sponsor us in this run through a donation upon us completing the 5K, there are a few different ways you can send me the amount that's on your heart. Just state the amount you are pledging and I will contact you as to how to get it to me in the week following the race. You can message it to me on Facebook, tell me in person, e-mail, or call/text. If you do not know us personally but want to pledge, you can do so by e-mailing us at richardsonadoptionafrica@gmail.com. Just include the amount you'd like to pledge and the best way to contact you (phone? text? facebook? e-mail?). Thank you in advance, whoever you are. I can't help but feel like there are going to be some that will support us in this way. 

Selling...

If you are my friend on Facebook, you undoubtedly know this already. But to those that don't, about two months ago I made the decision to start selling Scentsy brand products as a way to raise additional money for our adoption. If you haven't heard of Scentsy, it is described as "candles that are flameless and wickless. Decorative Scentsy Warmers use a 25-watt light bulb to heat scented wax. The scent is warmed out of the wax without the harm of lead, chemicals, or soot releasing into the air. There are more than 50 unique warmers and over 80 scents to choose from." In addition to warmers and other items that release a great scent (for example, Travel Tins and Scent Circles that can be used for cars or closets; a spray in many different scents to be used in any room; Scent Buddies, which are stuffed animals with a hidden scent packet to easily and safely fill a play room or child's bedroom with a wonderful scent of your choice), there is also a line of scented beauty products and products to use in your washer and dryer. I'm not going to spend a whole lot of time talking about Scentsy right now because, to be honest, it is not my undying passion. My undying passion is to bring my child(ren) home. So you can imagine how much it meant to me when friends and family alike came to my Launch Party and supported my new endeavor that is helping. Some of them bought so much that I fought back tears of gratitude. They weren't buying solely because they loved the products; They were buying to show me love... and I really felt it. 

Even though it cannot be a huge focus of mine in this stage of my life, this does NOT mean I don't enjoy selling Scentsy! In addition to the profit I make going to our adoption, I love being able to be confident about standing behind this product as a Consultant because it is high-quality, very useful (who doesn't want their house, car, body, and laundry to smell pleasant??), and I personally use it and have been impressed with how great it works. I haven't been as successful in raising funds this way because it does take a lot of time and effort. While I have enjoyed the two parties where I represented Scentsy as a Consultant, I do not have what it takes right now to try to convince people to host parties. I just am trying to get the word out that I have a product that is great for yourself or as a gift to others, and in buying it you help our cause. Maybe when I am finished with internship I will be able to put all the time and energy into growing my sales that I would like to. 

If you are interested in seeing what this Scentsy talk is about, you can look at the products/order from me on my website and have it sent directly to your home without even having any contact with me, which is especially great for those that aren't local but want to support our adoption in this way. My website is dezrichardson.scentsy.us (or just click here.). If you are local and want to smell the waxes before making an order, I would love to meet up with you and let you do that.

The 3rd and final fundraiser going on right now is our adoption t-shirt sales. This may sound pathetic, but they are still sitting in the box they were delivered in. In my mind I want to spread them out, take pictures, and list the quantities we have in the different sizes in hopes that someone will like the design, see their size, and contact me wanting to buy one (or two, or three...). But I haven't done that yet, and I think that part of the reason is that I'm scared. That sounds silly, and I hate to admit it because I just wrote a blog post a few months back about letting go of fear. But I have seen more than one adoption blog that have a post about what a failure their t-shirts were. And how they have boxes of them stored up in their garages. Wasted money, a failed investment that had hopes of a profit. We don't have a whole lot of room for failure in the financial part of our adoption timeline. Every penny counts. 

Oh! Side note, something I wanted to share that just typing "Every penny counts" reminded me about... a dear friend of ours told me that her teenage son is collecting a big jar of pennies to donate to our adoption. He decided he wanted to do that for us and asked her if she thought we could use them. I had to fight back some tears when she told me about it. The thoughtfulness, the love... So awesome. Ok, back to the t-shirts.

I have to fight through my fear of failure and get the word out there about all these shirts. After all, there have been some adoption bloggers who were so overwhelmed at the support they received in t-shirt sales. I think I still have a few people to contact that pre-ordered when I was trying to figure out how many I should buy, so I will start there... and I will get those pictures and the quantities up soon too. If you are interested in buying one, please leave me a comment below or use one of the contact methods I gave out earlier in this blog post. As always, I do not take your support for granted and I can never fully express our gratitude. 

(Part 2) Fundraising Effort #1 - Yard Sale

Day 3 - Saturday, June 16

To those that have been checking back in anticipation of "Part 2", I am sorry for the delay! I'm not going to be as detailed in this post (well, I am going to try not to be...).

Saturday started off better than Friday because I instantly felt less stressed due to the amount of help I had. I was still very sleep deprived, but the grogginess faded as I was filled with anticipation of what was to come. I was surrounded by such incredible people: My husband, his mom Kim, his sister Abby, my dear "little sister" Corvetta, and friends Jenn and Melissa. Jenn, Corvetta, and Melissa did a great job of organizing things, folding clothes, helping me price things, or anything else I asked of them. Kim brought lemonade, coffee, and a ton of baked goods to sell: Banana nut bread, chocolate chip muffins, blueberry muffins, brownies, walnut brownies, and then Abby brought a variety of cookies. The banana nut bread was a hit and sold out first. Brielle later came out and ran the bakery/ lemonade stand. Kim, known as "Kiki" to the grandkids, helped Brielle make change for people. Brielle loved being the "Baker" and cashier. Jenn made a sign that said "Brielle's Bakery" written in calligraphy that hung from the table. We all got a good laugh when someone would ask for a brownie or a muffin and Brielle would say, "Ok, that will be fifty dollars please." We tried explaining to her the difference between dollars and cents, but to her right now money is money and the value is irrelevant. :)

Regarding everyone that came early to help: Having each of them around was so moving to me... and although their talents and abilities in helping were wonderful, what had me frequently on the brink of tears was looking around and knowing they were there because they support this adoption. And I believe their support stems not solely out of love for us, but out of love for our child(ren) that they haven't yet laid eyes on. Not everyone that adopts has friends and family that agree with/ want to support their choice. To be honest, we weren't sure what type of reaction to expect from everyone but we knew God was pleased so that was enough to motivate us to go down this road. God is love. Without Him, love wouldn't exist and neither would we. This is where our "Motivated by Love" slogan comes from. Both God's love for us to adopt us into His family and His immeasurable desire to place orphans into families captivated our hearts and motivated us to take action.

I was SO HAPPY to have him with me Saturday!

Corvetta and Melissa. Both of these fabulous ladies have very special places in my heart.

KiKi, Jenn, and Brielle. Blessed to know each of them.

Below are pictures of our setup of all the stuff. Despite such a successful Friday, we still had more stuff than we could lay out! The clothing was definitely more organized due to all the help we got Friday night (see Part #1 post). Tony and Brett did a great job making a way for us to hang a lot of the clothes to make them more appealing and easier to browse through. 

We got to see many familiar faces on Saturday, which really made our day that much sweeter. Some of them picked out some items and then purposely overpaid us for them. Two of Brett's brothers in Christ came by simply to visit and donated cash. Christina, John, and Jess- three friends I talked about in the last post- came by with their families. To make things even greater, we were given a really cool offer: Sara Beth's parents are owners of an auto repair shop in a neighboring city. They offered their shop's parking lot and even their own home as locations for our next yard sale. As if that wasn't enough, they even offered to hold all of our current and future donated items in an unused storage area until then! This is such a HUGE blessing!! I feel like we cannot ever adequately express how thankful we are for everyone and everything. 

One of the consequences about waiting over a week later to finish a post I had started is that a lot of the details of the day have sorta blurred. So the following stories are in no particular order, but I wanted to share some of the day's events: 

Oops.

Remember the book Brielle got in her Chick-fil-a meal on Thursday? Well, here are two of the pages from it: 

I remember thinking as I read this part to Brielle how hard it would be to try to explain to a child that the stuffed animal she had set her heart on was not really for sale. Well, despite my efforts of scanning the entire box of stuffed animals to ensure none of Brielle's favorites were in there, one of them was. It was Valentine, her white Build-A-Bear cat wearing a pink dress that Brett and I bought her last Valentine's Day. And, at around noon, my heart dropped as I saw the little girl following her mom... holding tightly to the cat. My thoughts went about something like this: "Valentine! How did she get out here? I can't just take it away from the little girl. But this one is special, and worth so much more than the fifty cents or one dollar that we have priced all the stuffed animals at. Maybe it belonged to the girl and she's just carrying it around from yard sale to yard sale?" Maybe I over-analyzed what to do, but I just really did not want to face a brokenhearted sobbing little girl and an angry mom, chastising me for allowing the stuffed animal to make its way outside- which I felt was inevitable if I didn't handle the situation gently. Distracted by the yucky situation playing out in my head and not being 100% positive that it was Brielle's, I decided to say nothing until they came over to pay. Besides, maybe she's just playing with it until it's time to go, then she will be told to put it back. Lots of kids have done this with other toys all day... yep, that's what will happen. Problem solved.

Just as they came over to me to pay for their items, I took a harder look at the stuffed animal and felt certain it was Brielle's. And as I prepared to break the news to the mom and precious little girl, who was still tightly gripping Valentine, Brielle walked up...

It only took about half a heartbeat for her to realize what was going on. I was afraid she was going to do the same thing the boy did in the book and snatch it away... but she acted at a maturity level way beyond her age. She walked up to her and said that she was sorry but that was her kitty and asked if she could please have it back. Talk about a proud momma moment! I honestly was afraid she was going to burst into tears and be really mean about it, yanking it from the girl's grasp. The little girl just looked at Brielle, still clinging to it, as I explained to the mom what had happened. She smiled and explained to her daughter that the cat belonged to Brielle. I apologized profusely to both of them, and was relieved at the little girl's willingness to hand it over. No tears. No yelling, angry mom. Whew. I told the little girl to pick out another one and she could have it for free. Both mom and the little girl seemed happy with my offer, and I was happy that they were so understanding.

Awkward.
Contrary to what I anticipated, we only had about a handful of people that asked questions or wanted to talk about the adoption. The most awkward encounter happened Saturday. An elderly woman, probably in her sixties, walked up to Corvetta and me.
Lady: "So, you are going to adopt from Africa?"
Me: "Yes ma'am, we are in the process of it now!"
Lady: (not as enthusiastic as me) "Oh, ok." (Pointing to Corvetta) "Is she your daughter?"
Me: "No, she's my little sister."
Lady: (To me, confused yet nodding her head) "Oh, okay." (Looking at Corvetta, apparently assuming we were sisters through adoption) "So do you like it over here?"
Corvetta: (Smiling, and not wanting to embarass the woman) "Yes."
Lady: (Smiling) "Good."
Me: "Oh, she's not from Africa. She's from here."  

The woman sorta apologizes in an awkward fashion as she turns and walks away. Corvetta and I shared a good laugh about it. I wanted to explain to the woman that I call her my little sister because we are both daughters of God, therefore through our faith in Christ we are truly sisters.
(Even if she was adopted, what kind of question is, "Do you like it over here?" anyways!? *sigh*)

Another woman later asked Corvetta if we are all going to Africa. She explained that Brett and I will be going there when it's time to pick up our child(ren), but she isn't going. Again the woman left confused. Corvetta and I have adjusted to the confused looks. We hang out together a lot in town, and it seems like people try to figure out our relationship when they see a young black teenager with an almost-thirty, very white me. 

(This is for a later blog post, but through all this I can't help but think about the types of looks and potentially awkward situations we will face as a multiracial family. I've read in blogs and books about the types of things that strangers, some with good intentions and some without, commonly ask or say to multi-racial families and I have asked God already to show me how to reply using graceful words while also protecting my kids from hearing something that could hurt them.)

It all counts.

Saturday started off painfully slow. I was a little nervous at first, because I had heard that Saturdays are supposed to be busier than Fridays. Plus it was cloudy, which made the morning temperature more pleasant than the previous day. The people that were coming were buying small amounts, and I felt part of me wanting to worry that the day would flop but ultimately I just rested knowing that God's got this... He's got us, and every part of our life we surrender to Him. As Brett and I counted out the money at the end of the day, I was shocked to see that we had raised about $800. In change alone we had $30-something. These amounts shocked me. Not only did we seem slower, but the total purchases of each shopper were a lot lower. But I really felt God revealing something I already knew at a deeper level: Every dollar counts. Even every quarter. Every PENNY. A little here, a little there... it adds up, sometimes faster than we realize. 

So the weekend has been over for several days now, and it was harder than I imagined but worth every minute. Because on Monday, we headed to the bank with that $1,600 to deposit into our adoption fund. And on top of that, we still have loads of stuff left to put towards the next yard sale.

Our next yard sale will take place either in late July or the second week in August. If you or anyone you know is looking to get rid of some stuff, please let us know! We still have a large amount of clothing, but we can always use more- especially in girls and boys sizes 3T on up to young men's/ junior's sizes in girls. Furniture, home decor, DVDs, and books all also could be very helpful for us, as they were very popular items being sought after. In addition, anything not named here is also encouraged! Every little thing helps.

We are going to try to have a 3rd and final yard sale in October. The remaining stuff will either be passed on to someone else who plans on coordinating a fundraiser yard sale or it will be donated to charity. 

Next Up in Our Fundraising World: 

• T-shirts are here! (I will post pictures soon)
• I am becoming a Scentsy consultant, and will be having my first party within the next 3 weeks. 
• Cookbook order (huge thank you to Kim for this idea and collecting the recipes!)

One Final Thought:
It still feels "too good to be true"... that something I never thought would be possible which is literally life-changing for us as well as our future children is slowly unfolding right before my eyes. I feel so blessed that God chose us to walk this difficult, blessed, crazy beautiful path. Perhaps He has chosen you to do the same? If you ever have felt an inkling of desire to adopt, I want to encourage you to set aside all the "what if"s and human reasoning ("It's too expensive, we could never afford it...", etc) and seek God's will. It's not impossible, and it's not as scary as satan wants to make people believe as long as your eyes stay on Christ each step. It's gonna be worth it, I know this to be true for us and anyone else who chooses to take this path. It's worth it. 

(Part 1) Fundraising Effort #1 - Yard Sale

I have never organized a yard sale before. Well, scratch that... when we were moving from our home in Cleveland, Tennessee to Alabama in 2008 we decided at about 1 a.m. that a spontaneous yard sale in the morning would be the best way to downsize our amount of stuff. Our moving truck was almost full and we still had a lot more stuff to load. So we began putting things in the front lawn, made a sign out of cardboard and taped it over our no-longer-needed "House For Sale" sign so we could stake it into the ground by the highway, and went to sleep for a few hours. We planned on waking up at 7, but before our alarm went off we were awakened by a man ringing our doorbell telling us that he and others had been circling our house waiting for us to come out so they could shop. A few hours later, when almost all of it was gone, we gave away the remaining items to the last few shoppers and drove away. We ended up making an unexpected $400- $500 that day. 

I preface you with that to say that performing a successful yard sale on a whim like that gave me a false sense that organizing this yard sale over the course of a month would be much easier than it actually was. A yard sale is just a yard sale, right? But they were totally different in that the first yard sale was comprised of stuff we didn't really need to take with us and the money was just an added bonus to getting rid of it, whereas the success of this yard sale depended on us collecting donations of things that others didn't need (in addition to our things) and the money that could be made was the whole purpose, not an added bonus.

When we decided to do a yard sale as a fundraiser, I was fairly confident that we would be able to gather up a decent amount of item donations due to a number of friends and family that had already expressed a desire to help us in any way. I felt even better about this when, before I even posted the first request for donations, two wonderful ladies (Stacey-a thoughtful friend from church, and Tori-a friend that I haven't got to see in a while who I met at UNA) contacted me to ask if I would be having a yard sale soon and to tell me they had stuff they wanted to donate to it. Those calls happened one right after the other, and I was overwhelmed that they thought of us. "Overwhelmed" and "thankful", by the way, seems to be two words I use an awful lot lately. I'm sure many are tired of hearing me say them or put them in Facebook posts when talking about our adoption. Maybe I will switch to "speechless". Or "awestruck". There just really isn't a suitable enough way to explain what overtakes my heart when people step out in love, care, and kindness to show support for our adoption in a variety of ways.

After I announced the yard sale, many of you did not hesitate to contact me to let me know you had stuff you wanted to donate. I was so wonderfully surprised to hear from some of you, because we aren't "close" friends, related, or part of the same church. You know who you are, and I cannot tell you how much your donations meant. I honestly thought almost all of our donated items were going to come from people that fall into those three areas of relationship, but it ended up being about 50/50. To those of you that donated and we aren't close... it meant more to me than I can express. You didn't dismiss our need for donations due to the fact we don't see each other or talk. Instead, you decided to contact me, even if I hadn't had contact with you in 1, 3, or 12 years. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I can't express our gratitude enough. And to those who are close to us, our thankfulness runs just as deep. I hope you all know that, though I feel we can never show it enough.

We collected donations over the course of about six weeks as people contacted us. Some dropped by our home, others met me in town, and we drove to others' homes to pick up the things. My sister, who has a newborn, even sacrificed sleep to gather things to send with me the night before I left her house in North Carolina when I visited last month. Some gave a few items, knowing that every little bit would surely help, and others gave carloads of stuff. Every time a donation was made, we were thankful. We piled the boxes and bags and loose items into our once-empty office over the course of that time, and the room began filling up pretty fast.

The days leading up to the yard sale consisted of several last-minute donations, borrowing tables from friends and family, and lots of anticipation. On Thursday alone, we had four different friends make donations. Thursday also meant it was time to dig in and sort out the stuff. I wanted all of it to be categorized in some form or fashion. I personally would be less likely to buy stuff if I had to dig through random piles of things looking for something I could use. I'm going to use pictures to help me tell about the rest of our adventure.

Day 1 - Thursday, June 14

One of my best friends, Jana, came over Thursday morning despite the morning sickness
she's been having (12 weeks pregnant!) and the many things that were on her to-do list for that day.
Here she is with the mountain of adult clothing that she sorted out.

The bins and pile of donated baby boy clothes.

The pile of stuff that collected outside on Wednesday and Thursday because there was no more room inside.

After meeting two friends who gave the final donations at 5:00 p.m, we drove through
Chick-fil-a for a quick dinner. I couldn't help but smile to see this came in Brielle's
kid's meal. I know that was God's way of encouraging me as I stressed over the amount
of work that was left to be done. 

Organizing phase - Home decor, kitchen, and seasonal items

This is what my living room looked like after we were mostly finished categorizing.

One of my best friends, Jessica, came by after dinner and helped sort until midnight.
Having her around was so wonderful, and it put me in a really good, less-stressed mood.

Brielle was so excited about the yard sale! She wanted to help me bake cookies.

Brett came across these super cool, blinking Spiderman glasses as we put stuff outside.

I finally went to bed at about 2:00 a.m. and laid there for about 30-45 minutes, knowing that 5:30 was going to be arriving soon. Despite that knowledge, I simply don't have the gift of falling asleep instantly like my husband does. After I fell asleep, I dreamed of organizing yard sale stuff all night.

Day 2 - Friday, June 15

Brett and I hit the ground running when our alarms went off. He put the signs out and we worked fast to get things arranged and ready. Just a few minutes after 6:30 we had several people looking around and buying things. They disappeared just as fast as they arrived, then more would show up either seconds or several minutes later. Brett helped me until almost 8:00, then he had to leave for work. He was originally going to take the day off, but he found out Thursday that he needed to make a trip to Birmingham. I was a little disappointed at first, but I knew it wasn't his fault and I knew that God would be my strength.

Just as Brett was about to leave for work, a lot of people started showing up. Two of them, a woman probably in her late 40s/early 50s and her daughter who looked to be about in her mid-20s, approached me and asked about our adoption. I told them a little bit about it, and then they told me that their son/brother works in Africa. A smile spread across my face as I asked what he did. He builds wells for villages. This made me smile even bigger. As you all may already know, the lack of access to clean water is one of the reasons so many children and adults are sick- and even die- across much of Africa. They are forced to either walk many many miles to collect fresh water, if it is within walking distance. If it isn't, they have no choice but to use whatever nasty, disease-ridden water is available. What a rewarding job to have, one in which your work brings life and health and hope, impacting one village at a time.

The mom/daughter duo continued to look around as I bargained with others and bagged up their purchases. I was feeling overwhelmed at trying to help everyone, paired with the emotions of realizing that the way I envisioned the yard sale and what was actually happening were two completely different things. That usually happens with any given event in our lives, doesn't it? I envisioned that many pro-adoption people would see our posters, newspaper ads, or hear about our sale through Facebook and come flocking to show their support. It was a rude awakening to realize that most had no interest in supporting us any more than they did in supporting any other family who were having yard sales that day. I came to this conclusion after having the following conversation (or something similar to it) with shopper after shopper: 

Shopper: (picks up item) "How much for this?"
Me: "Would you like to make me an offer?"
Shopper: (staring at item, silent for a moment) "I don't know... just tell me how much you want for it."
Me: "Ok... how about three dollars? I think that is a fair price."
Shopper: (sets item down, shakes head) "No. Would you take a dollar for it?"

Depending on the item, I accepted their counter offer if it was something I felt probably wouldn't get much attention from other people over the remainder of the yard sale. But if it was something that I knew would be able to draw in the amount I asked, I tried to reach a compromise or was firm with the price I stated. I knew I needed to change my attitude, because I was finding myself slightly annoyed that nobody seemed to care that this wasn't a yard sale for us to make some extra money for ourselves. It is for our child(ren). Because always on my mind was that, even though I don't know the sex of our child(ren), their ages, or what they look like... they are right now an ocean away, living in an orphanage, and this sale is something we put together to get us a step closer to bringing them home. But a yard sale is a yard sale, and I could not let my emerging frustration take hold of me. I needed to remember that God is going to provide, no matter how circumstances seem at any given moment.

Back to the mom/daughter pair. They looked around for about ten more minutes, and then the daughter approached me with four books. I'd just had a bad bargaining experience with a woman where she talked me down on the price of every single item she had chosen because I was just too physically, emotionally, and mentally overwhelmed already and I just wanted to start bringing in some money. My vision of how the yard sale would go had already been smashed in the first 45 minutes, and now I was in survival mode. I smile at the women and look down at the books. Uncertain of a fair price for them, I asked, "How much would you like those books for?" 

"How about..." the daughter begins, as she starts to pull her hand out of her little accordion file folder that she was using as a wallet. "This?" she says with a smile. There are five $20 bills in her hand. I tried hard to control myself but there was no way. I burst into tears and asked her if she was serious. I was expecting a $5 bill or something smaller! She speaks words of encouragement, reminding me that it is a wonderful thing we are doing and telling me that she plans to adopt one day. I start thanking her through my tears and try to compose myself, only to realize that all of the shoppers have stopped looking at the tables and are staring at us. "Now you've got me crying!" one older woman says as she wipes her eyes. Another woman agrees with her, and then a third. A couple of men look at us all like we are crazy. Brett stepped out of the house just in time to witness what was going on and he, through a smile, pokes fun at me for melting into a blubbering mess and thanks the daughter for her generosity. She tells us that it is the amount God told her to give, and I speak blessing over her that may her generosity return to her one hundred fold when she is raising money for her own adoption one day. Still shocked and trying to compose myself, I apparently said something like, "Please come visit, you know where to find me!" I think Brett thinks I was just being awkward (which it was an awkward thing to say, I suppose), but I was dead serious. And my invitation to her had nothing to do with the money she gave. She listens to God's voice and she has a heart for adoption. We could easily become best friends in my book. (Besides, I have never been the shy, quiet type.)

After that awesome moment was over, I finally managed to regain my composure and continued to assist shoppers. I felt different now though; God had used the timing of all that to give me a new vision for the yard sale. He reminded me (as He graciously does often, it seems) that He is going to provide but I must trust and obey every step of the way. This weekend, trusting and obeying meant I was to do my best to just love the people sent my way and to not worry or stress over anything. I could show love for them by being kind, not judging them for not seeing my yard sale as anything special or out of the ordinary, being as fair as possible with pricing, and being genuinely friendly. 

Brielle woke up at about 10:30. Here she is writing down "how many dollars"
the totals of each purchase.

After God fixed my attitude, He also sent encouragement in the form of friends. Pictured above is our dear friend John, who stopped by to see if I needed any help. (He didn't really want to be in a picture, but he was such a good sport about it!) Things were kinda slow at this point, so he decided to help by making the display of items more appealing. All those shoes were just in one big messy pile under the table when he first arrived, and he didn't hesitate to match them up and organize them without me noticing until he was almost done. He also moved furniture items onto the driveway so people could see them from the street. It was so great to have him stop by just to see if he could help in any way. He told me to call if we needed any help at all. I was so encouraged, but I wasn't too surprised though... that's just the type of friends that he and his wife are. We love yall so much and love our friendship with you, Rainey family. 

In addition to John's surprise visit, I had two more: 

My bestie Jessica (that had helped so much Thursday night) came over and hung out with me while her daughter and Brielle played. She picked out some cookies and paid more than their worth for them. I so enjoyed having her there with me. She stayed until it was time for her to meet her husband on his lunch break... But didn't leave without first offering to bring me back some lunch! Lunch? Eating had sorta slipped my mind. I was delighted with her offer, and even more delighted that she stayed a little while longer to visit when she brought the food back.

Another good friend from church (Rachel) stopped by with her precious family. It lifted my spirits yet again to see a smiling, sweet familiar face. After picking out a few items, she also gave above and beyond the worth of the items. I got teary eyed, but managed to keep my composure this time. Again, our gratitude for the support cannot be put into words. 

At about 3:30 we brought everything into under the carport and Brett and Brielle laid down for a nap. As I was taking care of some things and getting ready to rest, my wonderful little sister Corvetta (we don't have the same parents, but we are sisters in Christ so I always call her my little sister... It confuses people, as you will hear in a story I will be telling in Part 2 about Saturday) texted to tell me that she hoped the yard sale went well and asked if I needed her help Saturday. After going a day alone due to not arranging for help Friday, I wasn't about to turn down anyone's offers! We made plans for her to just spend the night instead of waking up at 5 a.m. to go get her. 

I also received two more pleasant surprises at about the same time: 

Our dear friend Lanie offered to make dinner for her family, mine, and Corvetta and bring it over for us all to eat together. I was thrilled! What a thoughtful thing to do, and it was such a perfect ending to the first day. She is an incredible cook, and we love being around her, her husband, and their little son. After our 8 p.m. dinner, they stuck around for several more hours to help us re-organize and get things ready for the next morning. 

Another great friend Christina called me and offered to come over to help get things ready for Saturday morning. Her and her husband came over after putting their seven (yes, seven!) kids to bed. They brought with them hangers, a fence pole and rope to make a bar to hang clothes on, and two folding tables so we could display more items. We laughed and had some crazy goofy times as Christina helped me figure out ways to display things to make them more appealing to the shoppers. Many times during our 9 pm - midnight preparations I thought of how grateful I was for all of these terrific people. I thanked God for them and their desire to help us over and over.

Corvetta and I worked on hanging up adult clothes that were previously just laying in boxes

Christina working on baby boy clothes

I know this is a lot, and I still have one more day of pictures and stories! I am being so very detailed because this is my way of journaling through our adoption journey, and so many things happened that I do not want to forget. 

But before I go...

Our 2-day total was: $1,635.78

SPEECHLESS. THANKFUL. OVERWHELMED. HUMBLED. 

THANK YOU, WITH ALL WE HAVE, TO THOSE WHO DONATED AND HELPED AND SHOPPED. THANK YOU.

We're getting closer.

Peace Out, Worry... Hello, Fundraising!

For those of you that have been checking back here wanting updates and been disappointed time and time again... I am sorry! There will be far more frequent updates as the summer goes on and our process speeds up!

I finished up my last semester of on-campus classes almost three weeks ago. All that stands between me and my elementary education degree is 4 months of internship that starts in August! Since finals ended I have spent the majority of my time out of town visiting family. Brett was gone for two of those three weeks, so much of what we need to accomplish right now has had to be put on hold. This has been frustrating for me because I want to get everything done, move on to Referral process, and then start preparing to bring our child(ren) home. But one thing (of many) that God is teaching us through this is to not be anxious or frustrated and to trust Him fully. That includes trusting in His timing as well as His plans to provide the financial means to carry this to completion. I was worried about both of these things for a couple months, but I finally let go and put all of my trust in Him not too long ago. I refuse to worry anymore. It is pointless and a waste of time and energy, and above all it is a violation of his command that I do not worry. These Scriptures are being written on my heart so that I do not slip back into worry at any point and so I put all my trust in Him no matter what:

Philippians 4:6-7
Proverbs 3:5-6
Psalm 46:10
Psalm 55:22
Colossians 3:15

I am just going to trust, pray, be thankful, and obey, as His Word tells me to do these things instead. That being said, we have a lot of things in the works to get the financial burden lifted off this adoption process. It is not His desire that we sit around and expect for Him to provide the money with no effort on our part (though He is God and could certainly do it). He has prepared and equipped us to do our part. We choose to be proactive in what He is doing and what He will do to provide, so it is with a care-free heart that I present you with our current and upcoming fundraisers that you can be a part of if you desire. Have any additional ideas that you would like to share and partner with us in completing? Please contact me!

• Support Kelly Gore's weight loss! Woman of God. Breast cancer survivor. Amazing wife, mom, and friend. Kelly announced on Facebook today that she is setting a goal to lose 15 lbs in 6 weeks. She is seeking out donors who would like to support our adoption by donating $1 or more per pound that she loses! How awesome is this? Please message her on Facebook if you are interested, or contact me and I will give her your contact information.
• Donate unwanted items: We are having our first fundraiser yard sale on June 15th and 16th at our house. Please contact me if you have any new or gently used items that you would like to donate. ANYTHING that you think will sell is encouraged! (Furniture, antiques, shoes and clothing of any size, home decor, kitchen supplies, books, electronics that work, etc., etc.!) We can pick up the stuff, arrange to meet you, or you can drop it off at our home. Please contact me if you want to help in this way.
• Donate recipes: My awesome mother-in-law is creating a cookbook that we will be selling! She has been collecting recipes for a little over a month but we still have room for many more recipes. If you are interested in submitting recipes, please contact me and I will give you her e-mail address. I will write a new post with pictures when they arrive and are ready to be sold!
• Place a Scentsy order through me, come to my party, or throw a party: A close family friend is a Scentsy consultant. She contacted me offering to give me 100% of the profits if I would like to host a party! In addition... Because Scentsy is such a popular company with great products, there is a high chance that I too will become a Scentsy consultant for the sole purpose of putting all of my profits towards adoption expenses. Please let me know if you would also like to host a party, if you would like to be invited to the party I am hosting, or if you would like to place an order to go towards the party I am hosting.
• Buy a t-shirt: They will be available very soon. If they all sell in a decent time frame, we will make another design and place another order. As with the cookbook, I will post when they are ready. (If you pre-ordered, I will contact you the day they arrive.)
• Want to donate money? You can click on the "Donate" button on the right and send to our adoption account any amount you desire to give at any time.

*I can be reached at richardsonadoptionafrica@gmail.com, or you can message me on Facebook, where I am located as Desiree Rochell Richardson*

An Update, and a Million "Thank You"s

Well, I haven't posted in a couple months for 2 reasons:
1) School has been very demanding. Very.
2) There has not been any news to report.
We have been trudging through the mountain of paperwork, and we still have some other things to do before we are ready for the referral stage of this process. The referral stage is what we have been really looking forward to, because that is when we wait for a phone call and e-mail revealing the age and sex of our child (or children) as well as PICTURES!
If you are thinking, "Or children? What?": We are working on being approved to bring home two children instead of one! Whether or not we end up with two will depend on if there is a sibling group or cousins that are "true orphans" (more about that later) at the same time that we are waiting for our referral. We are still requesting that Brielle stay the oldest, so if we get two then they will be between newborn and age 3. We are completely trusting God with whatever happens. We know that He is orchestrating all of this, and our hearts will be overjoyed with whatever He has planned. It is so exciting! I feel like a child the night before Christmas, so anxious to see what gifts He has in store that I can't even sleep.

What's New?
I have contemplated how much to share right now, because I could probably write for hours about the emotions that I have been through and stuff that weighs heavy on my heart. Maybe I will later, but for now I have two specific things to share.

Firstly, I only have about 3 weeks of school remaining, and then I will be using A LOT of my free time working on fundraising! By the time I am finished with my last final, we will likely be in that waiting-for-referral phase that I just talked about. That waiting phase is usually the best time to start fundraising, and the fundraising probably won't stop until just before we are heading to Africa to get our child(ren). So many amazing friends and family members-(from our church family as well as our biological families)- have already stepped up to the plate and offered their talents and time to help us, and to each one of you... thank you. Thank you, a million times over! There are no words to express how grateful we are that you are showing such love and support towards us and the adoption. We haven't even held a single fundraiser yet, and already I have shed countless tears of gratitude simply from conversations with some who are excited and ready to do what it takes to get the financial aspect of this taken care of. As most of you probably know, international adoption is very expensive. I will get into the numbers later, but for now I just want to say THANK YOU in advance to those that are going to help us make this dream a reality.

On a side note, Brett and I are not the type that want to go looking for handouts or begging for money. We will be incredibly grateful and humbled by any monetary donations, and we will also work hard to raise the money in creative ways. We had been saving for this adoption and have already paid 1/3 of what is needed, which is a slight relief but we still have a big number staring us in the face. We are sitting down together tomorrow night and re-evaluating our budget to find things we can cut so that we can put more money aside each paycheck for the adoption. I know some people are hesitant or skeptical to give to fundraisers because they don't know where their money is going to end up or if it is truly needed. Every penny that is donated or made from fundraisers will be going directly to bringing an orphan (or 2 orphans) home to us- their forever family. I promise you that with all that's within me. We know God will place into those the desire to partner with us in this cause, and we are not going to let the financial burden of this scare us away. We almost let it scare us away from doing what it takes to be approved to bring 2 children home because the cost obviously goes up when you have a 2nd plane ticket, 2nd court fees, etc. to add to the grand total. But, thankfully God convicted us of that fear and assured us that He will provide. He is faithful.

The second thing I wanted to share is about an e-mail we received today. When we originally began this process, we were looking at receiving our referral between March and May, then going to pick up the child between December and February. Well, the Democratic Republic of Congo program at the agency we are using is a pilot program. This means that it is brand spankin' new, and we are one of the first families to be adopting from the DRC through this particular agency (they have well-established programs for several other countries, so we feel confident being in a pilot program ran by them). As with everything new, there are a lot of unknowns and things can change in the blink of an eye. The e-mail was full of wonderful news about how great things went when the international director and the international manager traveled to DRC to meet with many of the officials in Kinshasa (the capital) and the adoption community. It talked about how the officials were so impressed that my agency has approached them, showing such care and attention to the need of putting orphans into families. As a result, all of the officials gathered together to sign an official adoption agreement between the country of DRC and our agency! This is fabulous news, because it means things will move along much more smoothly than if no agreement was in place and, most importantly, orphans will be matched with loving families in a timely and structured fashion as a result.

Another great piece of news is that it was very obvious that our DRC attorney (a local Kinshasa lawyer who will be going to DRC court representing us during every legal stage of the adoption) is on a first-name basis with many of the officials and is a highly respected man. The woman who will be issuing the visa for our child(ren) said that of all the attorneys she works with, he is the very best. She said he is very diligent in his documentation and his investigative work is excellent on the cases before they even come to her desk. This is incredible news. Obviously our agency would not have chosen a lawyer if they knew he had a bad reputation or did poor work, but to find out that he is so well-known and well-respected with the officials who will be responsible for getting our adoption processed is just... well, it is awesome. We are so thankful.

Next came some news that at first sank my heart: Upon entering the referral waiting period, the wait time is now 6 months. Originally it was only 1-3 months. The 6 month waiting period is subject to change, but for now it is what we should expect. This means that after we move into referral phase in about 3 weeks, our wait time will begin and we can expect to receive a referral around October. :( BUT... the news got a little better as I read on in the e-mail. In the past, a child would need to be matched with a family before an abandonment certificate was issued. An abandonment certificate is required for an adoption to take place because it ensures that the child is a true orphan and not just temporarily disconnected from his/her biological family. So, many times what would happen in the past is a family like us would receive a referral, only to find out weeks or months later after an investigation was done that the child they had been matched with was not a true orphan. Can you imagine how heartbreaking that is? So I am glad that our agency has set up an agreement with the Municipality that abandonment certificates will be obtained before any child is referred to a family. Even though it means a few extra months until we can get a picture/ learn a little bit about our child(ren).

Well, that's all for now. Thanks again to those of you that are excited for us, encouraging us, remembering us in prayer, and looking forward to helping us in fundraising. Each of you are really making this journey so much better than it would be if we were on it alone. I just want you to know that we are so grateful and so humbled.